The 3 Stooges, starring Guillermo Barros Schelotto By: The 3 Stooges
15 comments Posted by Jed Zayner at 8:35 AMToday I wake early, because training was 30 minutes before. We played against 12, 13, maybe 14 year olds. The game was so, so, but it was harder than last saturday. The coach told them to play harder and they played with more confidence. (We played the U-17 National Team again today)
Steve: He did the Math and he realized he was more than twice as old as some of the kids he played against.
Sequence game one goes to Steve and Jed.
Gino is my room mate. He watches all the time spanish soap operas. He talk about it and I cannot understand because I never have seen it. Gino is fat, haha.
Robbie: Yeah, the soap operas are about spanish soccer players.
Guille: I don't know why he watches, maybe he get bored with me.
Robbie: What is your favorite show?
Guille: Super power woman's.
Jed, Robbie, and Steve: What is super power woman's?
Guille: It is cartoons for woman's.
Jed, Robbie, and Steve: Whatttttt? (All said with a look of bewilderment)
Robbie: Steve and I only watch Batman and X-men.
Guille: I have a favorite show where I only can see other soccer teams in the MLS. To know the other teams we play.
Steve: That is why he is always on MLS.net.
Jed: What do you spend your time doing then?
Guille: I spend my time reading or checking in the history of the world.
Steve: What is your favorite music to listen to while playing sequence?
Guille: Enya or Braveheart.
Robbie: What is your favorite thing about pre-season?
Guille: Seeing the snow. I prefer to see the snow in Columbus and Robbie Rogers.
Robbie: He comes to our room every night to play sequence.
Steve: We cannot get him outta here.
Sequence game two goes to Robbie and Guille.
Crap Sequence game three goes to Guille and Robbie. 2-1 in games, first team to get to 3 wins. Right now it is 2-1 also in best to 3 games to Steve and Jed.
Steve: What do you miss about your family?
Guille: The kids.
Steve: Why? They are wild and crazy.
Guille: Yeah I know, but I love them.
Robbie: I miss wrestling and fighting with the boys in the house.
Steve: I am going to kick the crap out of Nico this year (Guille's son).
Steve: Tell Jed about what we did last night.
Guille: Last night Gino got afraid, because me and my gang (Steve and Robbie), put the coins on Gino's window and go tack tack tack.
Steve: We went penny tapping on his window, haha.
Sequence game 3 goes to Robbie and Guille. Now we are tied 2-2 in games to 3.
Jed: Guille what is your most embarrassing story?
Robbie: I got one for him. We scared him in Argentina and I never have seen someone so scared. This dude screamed, jumped, and did super ninja kicks.
Guille: I no say nothing, I only jump.
Steve: It was pitch black and he put his kids to sleep and the whole time we talked about how dangerous it was in Argentina for people due to kidnappings. So, during the middle of the night we dressed in black and ran up on Guille at the "right time" after he put the kids to bed, acting like kidnappers. Mean? maybe a little. But, he freaked out, it was so funny.
Guille: No, I thought I get the animals out of the house, because one time I found a cat in my house.
Steve: Yeah right, you thought I was a freakin' beast.
Jed: You didn't think they were kidnappers?
Guille: No, I not too worried about kidnappers even it happens a lot.
Jed: Guille what is your favorite memory in soccer?
Guille: When we got the championship in LA, for MLS.
Jed, Robbie, and Steve: No, we mean ever, come on.
Guille: I cannot choose only one, because there are a lot of games that are very important for me. I do not know the best, but I do know the worst. When I played with the National Team I did not play very well.
Robbie: Why? Were you nervous?
Guille: I don't know. Because when I play so-so. The coach choose another player and they go to the World Cup.
Guille: I am waiting for everyone March 9th. You, da cold, and us.
Robbie: Sooo cheesy dude.
Labels: Columbus Crew, Guillermo Barros Schelotto, sequence
First of all we did not go to bed until 2 am.
Then, I woke up and the first thing Steve said to me was, "Dude, I had a dream with you and Lapper (assistant coach) playing 22 (card game)"
Robbie:uhh that's weird
But, all in all slept well.
I ate cereal and of course a glass of chocolate milk, then had my vitamins and off to training.
Training was actually good, at the beginning we got some fitness, and I did not think it was too bad. Then we moved onto actually kicking a soccer ball and I hoped to do some scoring, ya know, that's what I do. But, we did this possession game instead.
Steve: I cussed twice and it was at my brother-in-law both times (Adam Moffat)
Robbie: Sorry, I mean, I just wanted to play goal to goal; but you got to trust the coaches with pickin' the drills."
So, lunch was the best part. We had Guille, Emilio, and Gino over for lunch. We cooked chipotle barbecue chicken, brussel sprouts (with garlic and bacon), pizza, and you know what we top things off with in 1617, yep that is right, chocolate milk.
Then we chilled for lunch on the couches, chatting. We were just happy to please these foreigners because these dudes are super picky.
Guille: Caprichoso (spoiled boy)
Robbie: Ha, I know that's what you are, yep you got that right.
I took a little nap on the couch and somehow woke up for our afternoon lift. Which was not too bad. I am just happy soccer day four is done.
Onto dinner with Esteban (Steve's spanish name). Well, Steve and I were the only gringos with those latino dudes. Those dudes were: Emilio, Sergio (our new signed player from Columbia, he is a forward, more about him to come days following), Guille, and Gino. We went to "Stonewood Grill". It was a pretty good meal, great quesadillas, and great convos. Well, if you like to keep to yourself, because spanish was the only language being spoken, haters (I am the only who cannot speak it).
Then we went to Coldstone and Gino was the only one to get ice cream, typical Gino. Esteban tried to order in spanish, which was funny, because the lady at the register could not understand him and she said his spanish is just bad.
Robbie: Steve prides himself in his spanish ways, with how fluent he is and all.
Steve: In reality I was trying to teach you spanish last night. So, do not diss your master.
Now, we are sitting here playing Sequence again for the sixth night in a row and we will probably play till one or two in the morning again for the sixth night in a row. Maybe I will have my luck turn and actually win a game, I have not won for the past 10 games.
Steve: Hey come on, do not be so hard on yourself, it is more like 21, haha...
Oh yeah, Guille trys to play footsy with us while we are beating him in sequence.
Robbie: Why you stealin the chips Guille?
Guille: No, no I steal chips, I am relax.
Robbie: Look at this guys jacket he keeps so much stuff in here, do you have the chips in here Guille?
Steve: Guille why you always lookin at MLSnet?
Robbie: He is trying to see how much we all make.
Guille: What!!!!!
Labels: Robbie Rogers, sequence, Soccer
To Sequence or not to Sequence By: Steve Lenhart Day Three
1 comments Posted by Jed Zayner at 8:27 AMI woke up this morning very excited because this beautiful state is my birthplace.
I kept it simple with a banana.
Robbie Rogers: That's all you ate?
Steve: Yeah, because Bobbie (our coach) told me I was fat yesterday.
I knew it was gonna be a good day because I have God on my side, it is cheesy, but true.
First off, we have the dream team bus, an all-star line-up. It is good when we drive to practice because of the people we have in the bus. First, we have Gino Padula, wait why is he on our bus, no kidding.
Next, we have Guille, and well he bought all of mine and Robbie's meals in Argentina so that qualifies him.
The Eddie Gaven, because he does not say anything or cause trouble, but when he does it is hilarious. Not only does Eddie very kindly slap stuff out of people's hands and laugh hysterically. He also puts one dollar bills on his fishing lure and baits people into grabbing it while he constantly pulls it away like an ever increasing wind, nice one Ed.
Move onto Robbie Rogers, because we have gone through a gallon of chocolate milk a day and it was his idea.
Then Jed Zayner is on the bus, well because he is room mates with everyone else on the bus and we felt bad leaving him out. Still kidding, or am I. No I am, haha.
So, Adam Moffat, hmmm, it is better to have guys that try and break other guys' legs ride on your bus then on another, and shoot we have the rest of the foreigners on our bus so why not.
Emilio and Kenny, last but not least, because they are the only ones on the team who try and speak portuguese to each other. Why? No one knows, Emilio speaks spanish and Kenny English.
Now for the morning practice which was good, we did some solid fitness. Running up and down the field 6 times in 3 minutes with hurdles, ladders, back peddling, and a russian sreamin' at you, is not the funnest. Then played four games lasting six minutes each, 7 on 7. Whooaa, nope we were not tired at all.
Did simple things in the afternoon with our legs being so tired and all.
Moved onto the second practice where we worked on finishing and then after we went and picked up our other half gallon of chocolate milk.
I think the highlight of dinner was not the food or tonight, even though the food was good. I am still relishing in our after dinner "jerk off" from last night. Yes, I did say jerk off. It is a style of dance, come on what were you really thinking, gosh. Myself and another guy on our team jerked it together, again the dance, the actually dance that is called "the jerk", youtube it, there. Anyways it was a blast. I am doing the jerk in a pic below, check it out.
Kay, now I am ending the night with multiple games of sequence with Robbie. The all-time series is at me with 9, Guille with 7, and Robbie, well, he is our obstacle standing strong with one.
Last note and I bid you farewell with this: I am gonna live tomorrow like I lived today, and I am not gonna let anyone take away my fun.
Labels: Columbus Crew, sequence, Soccer, Steve lenhart